Your Me' Lange Maid

02/10/2019

How I spring clean my house:
1. Divide everything into three piles: things to keep, things to throw away and things to donate. Then, pour gasoline over all three piles and light them on fire.
2. Instead of hiring a cleaning company, hire someone to rob your home.
3. Move out in the middle of the night, taking nothing but your whiskey and children. Start over in a new town.
4. Throw away everything that doesn't bring you joy. This includes your teenagers, husband and all pants with zippers.
5. Pile all your belongings on a boat and give it a Viking funeral by lighting it on fire and sending it out to sea.
6. Don't clean. Let it get so bad that your family signs you up for a reality show where a professional comes in and cleans. Kick back and enjoy the money.
7. The mess isn't the problem. It's the fact that you can see it. Have your eyes surgically removed and never see again.
8. If you cannot afford the eye-removal surgery, just ingest enough booze that you cannot see. Stay this way forever.
9. You know that house in the movie "Up"? Well, I don't know if it would work, but buying four million helium balloons sounds easier than organizing the playroom right now.
10. Don’t clean. Those piles are your feminist protest.

If you need my services please feel free to PM me ; ) or feel free to do all of the above ; )Hope everyone is having a wonderful day!!

01/17/2019

01/17/2019

Do you need a routine, or one time house cleaning???? If so I'm your girl please message me!!

01/11/2019

Hello everyone!! First off I hope everyone's having a wonderful day!! Secondly unfortunately I am having a little bit of trouble with scheduling in the app on Facebook, It's a little bit confusing...... If you would like to book an appointment with me, I would like you to book a week in advance that way I can connect with you & discuss the services that you are requesting of me. And I will be prepared with all of my supplies to perform the service : ). As you all know I like to be organized and prepared, and I want to provide you with the absolute best customer service possible!!!. If you book an appointment you can put in the description of the services that you are requesting of me and your contact information whether you would like me to give you a phone call,talk to you through email, or you can direct message me on Facebook!! : ). You can choose to direct message me on Facebook to request an appointment and I will add it to the calendar to make things easier I sent my request for 2 days after the last scheduled appointment because I'm not sure how the scheduling is going to go when it was set for an hour it would let people request within the next hour and it was conflicting. I want to serve all of you the best that I can and I do not want any conflicting schedules or any confusion I am trying to make this as simple as possible for everyone!!!! If you have any suggestions you would like to convey,Please feel free to message me!!! I want your input and feedback I want to make my page as accessible as possible and simple and I want the scheduling to run smoothly!!! I want the absolute best for you & my business!!! Thank you so much for your Patience with all of this as I'm working out the Kinks ; ).I appreciate all of you!!!

01/10/2019

"Your Me' Lange Maid!!".

Hello my name is Jenna McCratic!!Before I tell you about the services I offer I would like to educate those who don't know what Me' Lange means I will give you the definition here ; ) .........Mé·lange

/māˈlänj/

noun

a mixture; a medley.

"a melange of tender vegetables and herbs"

synonyms:mixture, medley, blend, variety, mixed bag, mix, miscellany, diversity, collection, selection, assortment, assemblage, combination, motley collection, pot-pourri, conglomeration, jumble, mess, confusion, mishmash, hotchpotch, hodgepodge, ragbag, pastiche, patchwork, farrago, hash;More

Mélange | Definition of Mélange by Merriam-Webster

Merriam-Webster › dictionary › mélange

Dec 6, 2018 · Mélange definition is - a mixture often of incongruous elements. How to use mélange in a sentence. Did You Know ?

Melange (fictional drug) - Wikipedia

Wikipedia › wiki › Melange_(fictional_d...

Referred to as "the spice", melange can be mixed with food, and it is used to make beverages such as "spice coffee", "spice beer", and "spice liquor". Melange is in fact a drug in the clinical sense, and daily use can extend human life spans by hundreds of years.

Now that you know what it means... I would like to talk about what it means to me in My business!! I offer a variety of cleaning services!!,Not just the normal routine cleaning service you would find elsewhere!! I do offer regular routine cleaning services as well!!, but I also offer a little Bit extra!! hich includes but not limited to : Cleaning Out Garages, & Sheds, Cleaning Out Your Yard (if you have a bunch of clutter that you would like to get rid of),. Are you moving into a new home,Condo,or Apartment and you need it cleaned before you move all of your stuff in ??, Or are you moving out and does your landlord need you to clean up before you leave ?? Do you need my help to Clean out and Organize your childrens Playroom,& Bedrooms,Do you need me to clean and help Organize your Bathrooms,or Office Space?,Do your Cabinets, or Closets need cleaning or Organizing?,Do you need a Deep Cleaning of your home??,Do your Carpets need Shampooing ,or your Furniture, Etc...... I will of course not be able to do a complete cleaning all in one session. I will come in different sessions to help you clean up your entire house of clutter if needed!!, and I will teach you how to keep it from ever getting back that way!!, and I will show you the simple things that you can do on an everyday basis to help limit your time spent cleaning!!!. I will help you make a cleaning schedule that is tailored to your family and your needs!!!. A simple cleaning plan of your choosing for everyone in your home to follow on a weekly & monthly basis!!You will have more time to do the things you Love and spend more time with your Loved ones!!!
I want to add a little bit of spice back into your life!When your home is a mess, and full of clutter it changes the energy inside of your home!!It becomes overwhelming and consumes your happiness!! A lot of the times in relationships many couples argue over household chores. That's actually one of the number one main arguments that couples get into is chores, and who's responsibly is going to be to do what around the house??And your spending less quality time with one another and your family!!And singles you are stuck at home doing housework instead of enjoying your day off!!Enjoying things you love to do, or visiting with friends and family!!!And this one is for everyone!!!! Often before you fall asleep at night do you find yourself laying there thinking of all the things that you needed to get done that you didn't get around to doing Today?? .....but hopefully Tomorrow!!??. Is your New Year's resolution to get your life in order but you're struggling trying to find the time, the motivation,and energy to get it done?? Let me help you!!! Even if it's just One Space that you need cleaned!!,A regular routine clean!!,or your Entire House/Life!! For those of you who live in a mess and want to get your life back!!!. For those of you that horde and hold onto items that you want to let go but can't!!!I can help you!!!, and I can show you the way to never getting back to that point ever again!!,.I can show you tips,and tricks, and the best cleaning products that other cleaning service companies use that are on the market , that are available for you to buy at your local convenient store!! That won't put a hole in your pocket!!My number one top priority is customer satisfaction!!,and the overall happiness in your life!!!.Let me be your Me'Lange Maid!!!!!!!

**** Please feel free to Direct Message me for any Services you would like to request of me!! Upon request I will set a Date & Time to come to your location to do an estimate of the service you are requesting : ). I do not charge by the hour I charge by the job, and also under certain Services by square footage and how long it will take me to complete the job. You can rest assured I charge less than my competitors!!!, And if you choose for me to come and Coach you, and help you get your house back in order so you can start doing it on your own,and you will never have to spend money on other cleaning services ever again!!It will be a one time charge for me to coach you!!, and after that if you would like to use my services for regular routine cleaning you can choose to do so!! ; ) I would like to give you outstanding quality service with a fair price!! : )
Unfortunately as of right now I am not insured I am working on getting insured! right now : ). I am posting only for family, and friends ,and Friends of Family ,and friends to see my business. Not only for my safety but for yours as well!! I would like to Perform services for the people that I know,and trust !!,and who know and trust me!! I am just starting out in my business and ,I want to serve all of you & provide you with the absolute best services possible!!,In addition to providing you with outstanding customer service and quality!!!!. Let me be" Your Me' Lange Maid!!!".

01/10/2019