03/17/2020
For hand washing accompaniment or general amusement, sung to the tune of “I am the Very Model of a Modern Major General” from Pirates of Penzance. Thank you Gilbert and Sullivan, still relevant after all these years!
I am the very model of effective social distancing!
I listen to the experts on the topic of resistance-ing;
I know that brunch and yoga class aren’t nearly as imperative
As doing what I can to change the nation’s viral narrative.
I’m very well acquainted, too, with living solitarily
And confident that everyone can do it temporarily:
Go take a walk, or ride a bike, or dig into an unread book;
Avoid the bars and restaurants and carry out, or learn to cook.
There’s lots of stuff to watch online while keeping safe from sinus ills
(In this case, it’s far better to enjoy your Netflix MINUS chills)!
Adopt a pet, compose a ballad, write some earnest doggerel,
And help demolish Trump before our next event inaugural.
Pandemics are alarming, but they aren’t insurmountable
If everybody pitches in to hold ourselves accountable.
In short, please do your part to practice prudent co-existence-ing,
And be the very model of effective social distancing!
🤞👍👌👋👏👌✌️✌️👋🖐
-Eliza Rubinstein, a choral director from the Orange County area. Please credit her if you pass it along!